Arcanium #1: Dream Master


[Arcanium is a stream-of-consciousness feature that may-or-may-not have any meaning to you.]

I woke up from sort of a nightmare, and a lot of things swirling in my head. As I became more and more conscious, I tried knitting all these disparate elements into a type of cohesive narrative. And now I may try to do the same here. Will it be at all informative or entertaining? I have no idea.
–Journal, 1.26.19




I think of Philip K. Dick and his massive information-dump dreams, just dreaming of page after page, book after book…certainly, this must have had some impact on his overall health? …It’s not what the human mind/body is meant to consciously process, without spiritual training.
–Journal 1.7.15

An info-processing machine has become conscious, evolved, and now attempts to communicate with us in/through the info it must process.
–Philip K. Dick, “Exegesis,” chosen at random


It’s like that thing I read in the PKD biography…how he was probably robbed by the people he was letting into the house to hang out, the druggies…and how in his mind he turned that into this grand conspiracy that didn’t even factor in the most obvious conclusion…how that could have been the nucleus of of all the Valis stuff, the Exegesis, everything…something he used to feel better about being taken advantage of by people he trusted as friends.

Because maybe the most painful truth of all was the obvious; that he was naive and mentally ill. Maybe he needed almost 10,000 pages to deal with that.


that does not explain how he found out about his child’s birth defect, saving his life. Even if we make explanations for how he was thinking/talking in Ancient Greek, etc., knew things he “couldn’t” have known (perhaps he was exposed to all those things subconsciously as a student)…it doesn’t explain this apparently paranormal occurrence where he saw in a dream an impending medical condition deep in his child’s body, correctly diagnosing it.
–Journal, 4.12.15

I’ve flat-out had dreams that have come true. This has haunted me my entire life. These dreams are not always accurate. Often, they are symbolic; and often, they are largely the result of anxiety.

But the ones that do become “real”–it’s not like a little bit of a coincidence. It’s rather like a huge honking on-the-nose unexplainable *thing*…and then this thing happens, and it’s so weird, and then I have to go back to my normal mundane life like:


So why am I telling you this? I’m telling this to you specifically for this reason:

If it is in ANY WAY “true” that I have dreamt some of these events before they have happened, in a way that defies mere coincidence—especially if I have proof that I dreamt the event before it happened—then that means there is something more to life than what is commonly believed. Regarding the physics of reality as we know it.

And it’s not just me. You can set out right now to look up the amount of anecdotes people have had of dreaming an event before it has happened. Maybe they’re all liars? Some probably are liars…or drunk, or stoned, or out of their gourd. But there will be a percentage of cases that will be simply uncanny.

My point is…I really do think there is something more to life than that standard reality-physics-jazz-as-we-know-it. And I think it’s important to be open to that possibility. That thousands of years ago, humans used a faculty in their brains to occasionally anticipate events before they’ve happened—and maybe that was merely a survival mechanism. A primal compass. And then we became civilized, and killed all the gods (well, except for God, but then we killed him too), and became completely disconnected to this extra-sensory faculty. An extra-sensory faculty that was really something to help with our survival.

And we have it blocked-off.





But the problem is, I guess…since we are no longer trained in our society to grapple with such phenomena…we often do not have the spiritual footing, the spiritual foundation…that to delve into these things on our own, armed just with videos we saw on YouTube and half-baked meditation practices, and maybe some peyote or whatever the fuck…our bodies and minds may not be prepared for it. It may all exhaust us.


Like, for sure I believe it all wore Philip K. Dick out.

I’ve been recording and studying my dreams for more than 25 years. I’m kinda worn out, too.

I mean…what good did it all do?




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